The phone rings. What time is it? It feels like the middle of the night.
I look at my watch. Oh. 8am.
It must be important. People rarely call our home phone, especially in the morning. On my day off.
I swing my legs over the side of the bed and shuffle to the kitchen.
The caller ID says
LOAN COUNSELING
800-669-0102
Seriously?
These people call us constantly. Daily. We never pick up. We don’t need loan counseling. And even if we did, these people are the last place I’d turn. Calling me at all hours, interrupting my life… The nerve!
But I’m already up. Might as well answer and tell them to take us off their list.
I press the green button.
“Please hold for the next available representative,” says a woman’s voice, dripping with artificial cheerfulness.
Seriously?
I walk back to the bedroom and lie down, phone pressed to my ear. I’m committed now. I imagine what I’m going to say when the representative picks up the phone.
“You called me at 8am and WOKE ME UP, just to put me on hold?!”
As the minutes pass, my indignation grows.
I will teach these bozos a lesson!
They will feel my rage!
I will open up a can of AREYOUFREAKINGKIDDINGME?! on their sorry selves.
My heart is beating a little faster. I am ready for confrontation… hungry for it.
“I’m sorry…” It’s the woman again.
“I have been unable to find a live representative. We’ll call you again later.”
and the phone goes dead.
I throw it against the wall and lie there, fuming.
***
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December 30, 2011 at 6:44 pm
Give ‘em hell mama :D
January 1, 2012 at 4:37 pm
No way. I’ve never answered one of those calls, but seriously how can they even fund the telemarketing if they aren’t even there to talk to the people who DO pick up. Bizarre.
January 2, 2012 at 12:02 am
I can’t stand that they call and then you’re on hold waiting for them to make you feel like crap… um, no thanks.
January 4, 2012 at 9:11 pm
We keep getting calls for CardMember Services offering to reduce our interest rate. We don’t carry a balance!
Yesterday they woke me up from a nap and I finally pressed 1 and told them to take me off their list. I’m not even sure I finished my sentence before the lady hung up on me. Who wants to bet they call again in a few days?