The messiness of real life as seen from our living room window
July 2, 2009 – 9:55 amIn front of my house on the sidewalk stands a pile 45 feet wide and overflowing with furniture, pictures, bedding, pots and pans, clothes and more. So much more. It’s the entire contents of our neighbors’ house.
I stand back from the window as I look out because I don’t want the neighbor man to see me watching as he rifles through his stuff. I try to keep from spying but I find myself repeatedly drawn to the mini-drama taking place on our front lawn.
Yesterday morning a truck with a trailer pulls up in front of the house and out climb eight high school kids wearing medical masks and work gloves. A sheriff sits down in front of our house in the shade of a tree while the kids carry pile after pile out of the neighbor’s house and onto the sidewalk.
“Can I offer you some lemonade?” I asked the sheriff, “and also what is going on?”
Our neighbors have been evicted. The house that had been in their family since it was built was sold by the rest of the family and after two years of court battles our neighbors have lost. The court case. Their house. And their dignity.
“It’s their own fault,” says the tall man who is overseeing the teenage workers, “they were giving warning after warning. They had time to move out.” The conclusion of everyone who knows about the situation is the same: our neighbors created this mess.
We know it better than anyone. How they threw garbage off their deck into the enormous trash pile in their back yard. The shouting and screaming and crying that we heard through our windows. The refusal to care for their property. These were people with problems.
Still, when the family shows up and starts desperately trying to retrieve their things before they’re hauled off to the dump, there’s pity gnawing at my stomach.
It’s going to be such a relief to have them gone. To have normal neighbors.
And anyhow, it’s their own fault.
But. While it’s true that it’s their fault I still feel sorry for them. I feel sorry for their two teenage children - for the daughter who is sitting on the curb at midnight with her head in her hands.
I wonder where they’re going… where will they take the moving truck that they’re piling full and will the next place have room for the fourteen bins of Christmas decorations that sat in their front yard from November through April?
I pat my neighbor on the back and ask him if he’s ok and he carries on like a madman about how this is NOT HIS FAULT and I think how strange it is to be worried about what we think while their stuff is sitting around us on the sidewalk. He smells like he hasn’t showered in weeks and his face has aged 20 years.
The man with the trailer knocks on our door and says that all the stuff will be taken to the dump at 5:00 tomorrow.
I close the windows so that I can sleep while the neighbors continue their pilfering through the night. They’re still there this morning.
I wish they were gone.
It’s easier to judge this situation when it’s abstract; when I don’t have to see the daughter’s drawn face or the father’s desperation.
It’s easier to be happy about what’s going on when I focus on the giant hedge between our houses that can finally be trimmed to a reasonable size and ignore the pile of coats and shoes pulled directly from our neighbor’s closet.
It’s easier to rationalize when I don’t have to see the messiness of real life; when I can pretend that things are black and white and right and wrong. When I don’t have to witness the massive expanse of grey that clouds this very black and white situation, blurring the edges until there’s only a swirling mess of sadness.
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By Trenches of Mommyhood on Jul 2, 2009 | Reply
How heartbreaking.
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By Carrie on Jul 2, 2009 | Reply
Oh, that’s so sad. I hope they find a better situation soon, for the sake of those poor kids.
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By marymac on Jul 2, 2009 | Reply
sad- but well told story.
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By Carrie on Jul 2, 2009 | Reply
That is so sad, even if it is their fault - it is not the children’s fault and everyone deserves a chance to “make it” despite their mistakes. I hope they go somewhere that will help them turn their lives around for the better. :(
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By Luisa Perkins on Jul 2, 2009 | Reply
What a tragedy–but what a relief for you.
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By Kerrie on Jul 2, 2009 | Reply
Sad on many levels.
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By Kasey on Jul 2, 2009 | Reply
That is sad. I just had happen to someone down the street from us. They their entire hosue on the front lawn as well and were there all night. The next day…A LOT of it was still there and went to the dump. I just can’t imagine…
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By Eve on Jul 2, 2009 | Reply
Tragic. But a beautifully written post Jenny.
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By Kathleen on Jul 2, 2009 | Reply
Wow, that is so intense. Reality right there in your face. Hope your home regain its peaceful equilibrium soon.
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By Carla on Jul 3, 2009 | Reply
Very sad, indeed. I feel for them in their desperation and the chaos they created.
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By Storm on Jul 3, 2009 | Reply
Well written as always. Very sad for them but very frustratin for you. I hope the outcome for all involved is a good one.
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By Just Jiff on Jul 6, 2009 | Reply
I’m with you. I’d be sad. Especially for the teenaged girl who sits outside at night. Its hard enough being a teenager.
I hate that everyone seems to think they created the chaos. Until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes…
Anyway, hopefully you will get nice, new pleasant neighbors and your old ones will find a nice home where some of their problems will be gone. I try to fix the world, but you know how that goes.
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By tuesday on Jul 7, 2009 | Reply
I feel sad for the kids, they are jsut along for the horrible ride. People make their beds, but the kids always have to lie with them.
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By Dumblond on Jul 7, 2009 | Reply
I had to oversee a few evictions as part of my last job. No matter who is at fault, it is still uncomfortable to have to do.
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By Bethany on Jul 8, 2009 | Reply
That is so sad :( I’d feel badly for them too- that would be so hard.
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By justagirl on Jul 8, 2009 | Reply
very poetic but sad post. well said!
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By creative type dad on Jul 9, 2009 | Reply
Truly a sad story…
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By Dana on Jul 12, 2009 | Reply
I think I would be depressed to witness such sadness… even if they did create their own problem.
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By Mad Woman on Jul 13, 2009 | Reply
How sad for them. I’m sure it’s going to be a relief for you as well, and I’m glad of that…..but I sure hope that for the sake of the children they have found something and will try harder this time around.
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By Melody on Jul 16, 2009 | Reply
Just when I started to complain about the massage chair at the nail salon being too violent I read this post and realize I have much too much to be thankful for. It’s all relative and my heart is sad for this displaced family even if there were steps of bad decisions that led up to the eviction.
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By Lisa Christiano Rose on Jul 18, 2009 | Reply
I love your writing. What a gut-wrenching story. Everywhere you look these days, people’s lives are in ruins. Foreclosures, evictions, businesses boarded up. This is a critical, hold-on-tight, wake-up call for this country. I feel the utter despair every time I see a homeless person. They are seemingly everywhere these days. I am always left with a feeling of helplessness and guilt. Great post. These stories need to be told.
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