Presidential duties 101: a really confusing primer

“Who did you vote for today, CJ?” Jay asks.

“Baracko Bama.”  CJ says proudly.  Then he adds, ”Baracko Bama WON.”  

Turns out Mrs. H’s kindergarten class is a blue state.  Too bad they don’t have any electoral votes.

After dinner Jay is eagerly checking the polls.  CJ can’t help but get caught up in the excitement.  ”Is Baracko Bama WINNING?” he asks.

“So far.”

Later on we’re sitting on the couch when CJ asks, “Mommy, if Baracko Bama wins, does that mean he will tell us what to do and then we have to do it?”

“Well CJ,” I say, “not really.”

“So what does he DO?” he asks.

“Uh… well… he takes care of people who need help… and fights bad countries who want to attack America… and gives money to schools so they can teach kids.”

Describing what the President does in words that a 5-year old can understand is hard. Especially for me, the world’s worst explainer.

“He does all that stuff?” CJ is impressed.

“Mm hmm.”  I’m not sure what inspires my next statement… maybe just a desire for accuracy. “He also takes our money.”

CJ’s eyes shoot open.  ”You mean he SNEAKS in and takes it?  Obama is going to SNEAK IN and TAKE OUR MONEY?”  

I giggle.  I can’t help it.  ”No no no, we GIVE it to him.  We give him some of our money so he can pay for all that stuff that he does.”

“He comes to our house?”  CJ sits up straight and looks toward the door. Any minute Baracko Bama should be arriving to collect our money.

“No… we mail it to him.”

“Oh.”  CJ thinks about this for a minute.  ”But how do we know where he lives?”

“Well we just send it to a place called the IRS.”

“Is that where he lives?  Does Baracko Bama live in the IRS?”

“Uh… well, not exactly.”

This is why I don’t home school.

***
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