The more I think about it, the more it bothers me that we let just anyone vote.
For example, let’s take the people who buy jeans that give them a muffin top and then wear them. In public. Or the people who STILL insist on talking on their cell phones while driving. Or the people who wear Crocs all the time to everywhere. They’re Crocs, people, they shouldn’t leave the house!
The truth is that some people have impaired judgement. Do we really want them choosing the new leader of the free world?
Which is why I’m proposing a NEW and IMPROVED voting system.
With MY plan, voters have to answer simple questions about the candidates for which they’re voting. If they choose incorrectly, their vote doesn’t count. (Also if they wear Crocs to the polling place. Ahem.)
Here’s an example.
Answer carefully! Questions are harder than they appear. Or are they?
Now it gets REALLY tricky.
If you made it this far…
We’ll take your vote.
Happy election day! And seriously. If you’re not-so-bright, uninformed, or generally just ignorant… Consider staying home this election day, and let the rest of us decide.
***Like what you're reading? You can help me achieve my life-long dream of publishing a book by supporting this blog, which is a platform that can help me get published! (Click here to learn more about my book) There are lots of ways to show your support:
- Subscribe by RSS or Email
- Like Absolutely Bananas on Facebook
- Share this post on Facebook (click the link below "Related Posts")
- Tell a friend about Absolutely Bananas
- Leave a comment. They're like candy, but without the calories. :)
xo Jen
November 3, 2008 at 3:35 pm
THis is fabulous. I vote you for president.
The Diaper Diariess last blog post..Happy Halloween and Stuff
November 3, 2008 at 3:40 pm
… as long as you’re not wearing crocs… ;)
November 3, 2008 at 3:45 pm
lol, if only it were that simple!! hugs and prayers…
November 3, 2008 at 3:46 pm
I don’t often wear normal crocs out of the house, but I just bought Croc boots that are SO cute and unCroclike that I plan to wear them everywhere possible.
November 3, 2008 at 3:46 pm
A classic!
I would like to add, anyone who drives up to the polling station in a bright yellow Hummer. Especially one with those white decals all over the back window.
(Note to my neighborhood: of course I am only joking. Obviously I didn’t mean *you*.)
Sophie,Inzaburbss last blog post..You May Be Surprised
November 3, 2008 at 4:07 pm
Don’t be a Croc hater! I love mine…I don’t wear them out of the house all that often but on occasion, it’s necessary. I have tons of problems with my huge, very flat feet and I have yet to find a good looking pair of shoes that also don’t make my feet hurt by the end of the day. Don’t be a Croc hater!
:)
Dumblonds last blog post..Which party would you belong to?
November 3, 2008 at 4:15 pm
I don’t mind letting the ignorant vote, as long as *I* get to tell them who to vote for. ;-)
zenmommas last blog post..A Non-Con Halloween
November 3, 2008 at 4:15 pm
Amen on the crocs issue & I think I enjoyed your polling method much more than the current method.
Sherilyns last blog post..Before You Go To The Polls
November 3, 2008 at 4:42 pm
My sister and I were just discussing this subject this very afternoon, and decided that you should have to pass a test in order to vote. I like yours. No ignoramuses (ignoramusi?) allowed.
Susannes last blog post..The Benefits of Democracy
November 3, 2008 at 5:51 pm
In all actuality, I’m not sure that I will vote. I don’t like either major candidate.
Kimbers last blog post..My Moment Of Courage
November 3, 2008 at 5:51 pm
I finally got around to trashing my Crocs. In other words, I’m over them. It took two years, but it finally happened.
But now that I read All Adither’s comments about the Croc boots, I might just have to get a pair of those.
The post is hilarious Jenny…even more so because there are some people this truly applies to! *lol*
Audss last blog post..History Will Be Made, Either Way
November 3, 2008 at 5:59 pm
I don’t even own crocs! Does that mean I get to vote more than once?
HeatherYs last blog post..Mind Your Own Shopping Cart Please!
November 3, 2008 at 6:05 pm
I like the one about the primary issue. lol. how sad this has become.
sheilas last blog post..Tattoo you
November 3, 2008 at 6:22 pm
A-men!!! I keep telling people not to vote and all I get is dirty looks. But, REALLY, if you don’t know the issues, it’s like throwing a dart and picking the one you hit?!
MommyNamedAprils last blog post..Boys will be Boys.
November 3, 2008 at 6:27 pm
I voted AND I wore my Crocs to the polling place. Take that! ;)
Angie @ Many Little Blessingss last blog post..31 Layouts in 31 Days
November 3, 2008 at 6:47 pm
Luv luv luv your plan! It is positively brilliant.
My mom said just the other day “I used to think everyone should exercise their right to vote but now I don’t think so.”
Couldn’t agree more!
Kathleens last blog post..Make Me Laugh Monday – Church Humour
November 3, 2008 at 7:09 pm
Woo hoo! You’ve got MY vote.
HellTygrs last blog post..I’m still around!
November 3, 2008 at 11:34 pm
Actually, there used to be a test for getting to vote. You had to be white, landholding or wealthy, and a male. Fortunately such elitist views were overridden by the suffrage and civil rights movements (which was more than just votes for women and mixed schools).
The problem (if you want to call it that) with equal rights for all citizens is that you have to believe in equal rights all the time, not just when it makes you feel good (like seeing someone with Down’s syndrome flipping burgers) or suits your own purposes (like having them vote for your candidate). I’m not trying to flame you, just point out the logical end to your beginning.
The founding fathers agreed with you, by the way. It was they who set the criterion for voting in the first place.
Rabbi’s Wifes last blog post..Can’t you just get a Rabbi to bless this?
November 4, 2008 at 12:34 pm
I hear you. But, for the sake of argument, what’s wrong with the concept of putting some mechanism in place that ensures that people know who/what they’re voting for? Not that it would ever happen, but it seems to me that a simple verification question in the ballot wouldn’t be infringing on anyone’s rights.
We have the “right to bear arms” but that doesn’t mean we hand everyone a gun.
If someone is filling in bubbles but has no idea what they stand for, that isn’t voting. It’s filling in bubbles. Our constituation never guaranteed anyone the right to fill in bubbles.
On the other hand I have a feeling that denying rights to people based on their fashion sense (or lack thereof) is probably not so constitutional. Darn.
:)
November 4, 2008 at 6:57 am
If only it were that simple…
GHDs last blog post..A Halloween Post-Mortem
November 4, 2008 at 7:08 am
Hi I just stumbled on your blog today. I must say that I agree completely with you. People should need to prove that they are somewhat informed about the issue and haven’t been living in a hole for the past few months. Those images are hilarious but surprisingly enough I know that some people wouldn’t be able to accurately answer them.
Caitys last blog post..Elect? Shun? Day.
November 4, 2008 at 9:33 am
I agree, woman who still wear banana clips and men who wear shorts in the winter should not be allowed near the voting centers!
tuesdays last blog post..Kiss Me I Voted
November 4, 2008 at 12:17 pm
Good points! On a Crocs note, I wore them everywhere while pregnant–the only shoes that would fit my HUGELY swollen feet:-)
Mama Koalas last blog post..Voting=Free Food
November 4, 2008 at 12:43 pm
I wear Lands End Trellos– not much better than Crocs but seriously can’t I wear them to CVS and Kroger? I wear cute shoes to church and social gatherings, I swear! But shopping – shopping hurts my feet!
Jenny from Mommin’ It Up!s last blog post..Child Safety Scares Me…How About You?
November 5, 2008 at 10:35 am
I thought about you as I voted yesterday (NOT wearing crocs)… This was a funny post! I loved the fake questions.
I bet McCain had crocs on while he gave his concession speech.
;)
November 16, 2008 at 1:50 am
Hear, hear! But then, we let people vote who can’t prove who they are, let alone that they know who the candidates are!
Heidis last blog post..Fun links