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A whole lot of Pottery Barn
June 25, 2008 – 8:02 pmSomehow I ended up on Pottery Barn’s mailing list.
On a weekly basis my mailbox piles up with:
- Pottery Barn
- Pottery Barn Baby
- Pottery Barn Kids
- Pottery Barn Teen
- Pottery Barn Bed & Bath
- Pottery Barn Outdoor Spaces
… which is a whole lot of Pottery Barn indeed, especially for someone who’s not that into pots or barns.
First of all, I will confess that I have been known to shop at Pottery Barn. And, in general, I really have nothing against mass-producers of stuff. For example, Target and I are BFF’s. I love the Gap. And Eddie Bauer has a distinct place in my wardrobe.
However.
I flip through these catalogs and I start getting all aghast.
You would too. Just flip through the latest version of Pottery Barn Kids and play a little game called “add up how much the baby’s room costs”. (it’s rather horrifying)
It makes you wonder, who ARE these people who can afford to spend thousands upon thousands of dollars theme-ifying their baby’s room? And then upgrading the theme when the baby becomes a “kid”? And again for their “teen”? We’re talking tens of thousands of dollars on ROOM DECOR for a CHILD!
(And Pottery Barn isn’t even ‘high end’!)
I’m pretty sure that these people must be mean and snobbish and really undeserving of their vast stores of expendable income. They probably never donate money to charity and I bet they don’t give TWO HOOTS about the spotted owls or even care about the polar bears.
Either that, or these people are MY AS-OF-YET UNMET NEW BEST FRIENDS.
Like whoever lives here, for example. CALL ME.
Or the owner of this property. We’d get along famously… I just know it!
It’s true, I’m a sell-out for a beach umbrella and a nice view.
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By Honey Mommy on Jun 25, 2008 | Reply
Oh my heck! My husband and I just about laughed ourselves silly reading this post! You are absolutely hilarious.
When you meet those lovely people with all the furniture and the theme-ified baby’s room, don’t forget about me! I could be their friend! (just don’t mention that my baby’s room has white walls, his crib has NO cutesy bumpers or ruffles, and my toddler doesn’t even have themed sheets… OH THE HORROR!)
Honey Mommys last blog post..Sprinkler Tag
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By Auds at Barking Mad on Jun 25, 2008 | Reply
Dude…haven’t I told you before to stop posting piccies of my patio set! *lol*
I WISH!
Serioulsly, Posh Tots makes Pottery Barn baby/kids/teen look like garage sale cast offs. I know people with names like Britney, Gwen, Katie, and Hallie all shop at Posh Tots. I can’t even afford to look at the website let alone buy anything from it. Besides, my husband would SHOOT me so dead they’d have to bury me twice if I did.
Like you, I’ve bought a couple of things from Pottery Barn. I really like their themed stuff…like girlie surfboard stuff for little girls, which is how we’re decorating the Little Imp’s room this summer. However, I refuse to pay the outrageous prices they want. I cheated - I used pics from the catalogs and am paying a friend of mine about half of what it would cost had I bought it from PB, to make the comforter, curtains and stencil surfboards on her wall and her hubby is going to craft a surfboard coatrack for her room.
Alas, I am a catalog junkie and if nothing more, I get great ideas from some of them.
Yet another great post Jenny! And am really loving the new site layout. It “pops”!
Auds at Barking Mads last blog post..I Went Looking for One Thing and Found Another
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By Lindsay on Jun 25, 2008 | Reply
Ahh, Pottery Barn catalogs, or as I like to call them, the “I can dream” catalog, or the “I’ve I had millions from being a SAHM” catalog, or the “Here baby, something you can shred to pieces and Mama won’t care” catalog.
Seriously, who can AFFORD a $5000 OUTDOOR living room by the ocean? When you get the hook-ups as their friend, give me a ring. I’ll bring the margaritas.
Lindsays last blog post..(almost) WORDLESS WEDNESDAY
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By World's Greatest Mommy on Jun 25, 2008 | Reply
Okay, here’s the plan. You meet them…and then introduce them to me.
Tell them I’m funny. Almost as funny as you. We can lie around on their deck chairs and tell them funny things.
It’s a win-win.
World’s Greatest Mommys last blog post..Dress Code for Being Introduced to A Mermaid
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By Carrie on Jun 25, 2008 | Reply
Dude. That latest catalog with all the matchy matchy summer stuff was lovely to look at - but seriously, my dog would have a heyday with all those plump cushions . . . but a girl can dream.
And yeah, I looked at bedroom pieces for Katie there a few years ago and got some cute ideas, but here was no way I was spending over a grand for a twin girls’ bed. I got her a beautiful white wrought iron one at jcpenney.com for around $200. And now I can sleep at night.
Carries last blog post..Rolled Up
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By jennifer on Jun 25, 2008 | Reply
I am too cheap for that!! WAY to cheap! I will however, Love to meet them. I can see how wonderful my cran and vodka will taste gasping over their view that they see daily…. Then I will remember that they have a mortgage that is more than mine for 6 months and the hurricane will clear that off faster than it was put together!
I’m good with my chairs and my view now… When it gets dark I have a wonderful imagination!!!
Hilarious post BTW
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By Sunshine on Jun 25, 2008 | Reply
I splurge for Pottery Barn quilts but that is about it. I would, somehow, like to live within the pages of a Potter Barn catalog. Life is so perfect when everything matches, right??
Have you ever noticed the children are appropriately artistic and not at all messy? Who are these alien life forms, I want to rent one for a day! For taking to restaurants so people will think I’m the perfect mom!
Sunshines last blog post..Not A Close Up - But a Nearby
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By All Adither on Jun 25, 2008 | Reply
I like to play a little game called: How many acres of a landfill is Pottery Barn responsible for?
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By Mrs. F on Jun 25, 2008 | Reply
OMG, you moved…and there are a few recent posts that I have yet to read…and this comment is completely irrelevant to the post. I do not think my reader is sending me your posts, I found this one through twitter. Oh jeez, life is so confusing right now. Must go figure this out…
Mrs. Fs last blog post..This and That and A Meme
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By natalie on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
i have a friend who seems to redecorate her kids’ rooms every couple of years. once when i was there she bought throw pillows for her couches because she had been looking for some for awhile but never could find any she liked. i can’t even remember the outrageous price she paid, but i remember cringing. later that same day she complained that they just can’t get ahead and always seem to have endless credit card bills. um…duh…i wonder why!
natalies last blog post..Dirt road to fun
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By Queen of Shake Shake on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
You forget to mention the unrealistic neatness of the kid’s bedrooms too.
Where are their stuffed animals piled all on the bed?
Because what kid doesn’t have a mountain of stuffed animals?
Queen of Shake Shakes last blog post..Mission Accomplished (Insert Maniacal Laughter Here)
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By Jess on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
Oh I get those catalogs. DH groans everytime he sees a new one in the mail. Not because I buy anything from them but because I say ” Hey honey do you see this? Can you make it?”
Jesss last blog post..She found his stash… now she thinks she might dash.
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By In the Trenches of Mommyhood on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
Yeah, I have PB taste on a Target budget. But once, I was going to splurge on those square coffee tables from PB that also are storage bins. When we saw them in the store, we realized that they weren’t even REAL WOOD!
In the Trenches of Mommyhoods last blog post..A Giveaway! ($50.00 value)
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By Laurie Furber on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
I work for PB and I’ll be your new best friend. My backyard has the beach umbrella, but sadly, no Hawaiian ocean view!
Cute blog. I love your header.
Laurie Furbers last blog post..Life in the White House
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By Jakki on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
First, I noticed some new things around here…me likey.
Second…anytime a BABY had a better bed than I do…there’s something WRONG.
Third…yes I’m jealous.
Jakkis last blog post..Just Another Day…
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By Mamasphere on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
I get ALL SIX catalogs, too. I flip straight to the back, where everything is highlighted in red borders. Otherwise known as the sale/clearance section.
I do glance through the rest of the pages to get ideas for furniture placement, or color matching. But if I ever splurged on more than a tablecloth, my husband would have a heart attack.
I did buy the charger thing for our countertop. It was to save my fruit bowl from all the debris that always landed in it. But my husband doesn’t know where it’s from!
Mamaspheres last blog post..One Year
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By moosh in indy. on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
I have an extra circa 1950’s barca lounger you are more than welcome to kick back in and enjoy a frosty beverage.
moosh in indy.s last blog post..Why you should enter every online contest ever, except for the ones I’m entering.
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By ali on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
i *love* Pottery Barn kids…i’m no longer allowed to go into the store…because there’s no way i can justify buying anything in there… ;)
alis last blog post..18A 4RE and other such idiocy
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By Flea on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
I don’t want to be their friend. I want to smock for their babies and charge astronomical amounts of money!
Fleas last blog post..Mix ‘n’ Match
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By MommyTime on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
I LOVES me some beach-side swimming pool! So when you meet that person, can you call me? m’kay? I promise to bring over a pitcher of pomegranate martinis and some small light cookie make of coconut that is perfect for nibbling under a beach umbrella.
Also, I saw your tweet about subscriber count. You need to put up a post on your old blogger site that says you’ve moved and gives the new feedburner or other subscription link. Although your url doesn’t seem to have changed, your subscription address apparently has (I know this because after I saw your tweet, I look at my reader and then went to your page, and saw there were a whole slew of posts that I didn’t know went up. I’ve been entertaining family for the last week and reading blogs very lightly, so I may have missed your post about moving — but I don’t think so.) Hope this helps… off to resubscribe to the new feed… your number will increase by one shortly. :)
MommyTimes last blog post..The Rhythm of Days
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By KD @ A Bit Squirrelly on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
I <3 Pottery Barn. A Lot. Even though C constantly reminds me that $1000 for bedding for our five year old is asinine. I still <3 it.
KD @ A Bit Squirrellys last blog post..Seriously the SMOKIN’-EST Hiker EVAH (SFMTY)
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By staciesmadness on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
Right…I want to be THAT person who has that furniture and view and money…and yeah. ALL. OF. IT.
staciesmadnesss last blog post..New Do Thursday
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By Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritas on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
I did the Pottery Barn nursery. I have to dry clean my $250.00 bumper pads. Crib sheets - $60 each. And he’s my third child, so it’s not like I don’t know better. I just.lost.my.mind. And it was cheaper than the Serena and Lilly I really wanted. Oh how I justify. That should be my blog’s name - How I Justify!
Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritass last blog post..Wordless Wednesday - A Boy and His Dog
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By It All Started With a Kiss on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
At my place there’s a beautiful lakefront view… but the furniture is not quite the cutesy stuff you so desire. More like the $10 plastic chairs that stick to the back of your legs. But I can pick them up WITH ONE HAND. I don’t know why that’s important. Just thought I’d throw that in there.
It All Started With a Kisss last blog post..Lists are fun
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By the planet of janet on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
i’m so there.
have the cabana boy bring me a mojito, will ya?
the planet of janets last blog post..To the moon, Alice!
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By Maureen on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
I wonder if the owners of those outdoor living room sets bring everything in when they leave? Either that, or they hire security guards to keep the vandals and theives away…. sheesh.
Maureens last blog post..I Rock!
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By Mrs. Schmitty on Jun 26, 2008 | Reply
I Lurve me some Pottery Barn…though this gal has only ever window-shopped their catalog.
I always say that if I win the lottery, my house will be done strictly in Pottery Barn.
Guess I should start playing the lottery.
Mrs. Schmittys last blog post..Superballs And Bouncy Balls
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By Lynette on Jun 27, 2008 | Reply
When you become BFFs with these beautiful places..uh, PEOPLE..can I be YOUR BFF? LOL. Then you can take me along.
Lynettes last blog post..I guess it’s an educational crapshoot
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By Ashley on Jun 27, 2008 | Reply
I love this post! Hilarious! I know EXACTLY what you mean about Pottery Barn. It’s not even supposed to be high end, but I’ve never dared to step foot in a Pottery Barn kids because I know I’d want to spend a million dollars there so I just don’t let myself near it. AND, believe it or not, last year we WON a $5,000 Pottery Barn gift certificate. It was amazing and I got some seriously beautiful things! But you’d also be amazed at how few things we could buy for the $5,000. It was gone SO quickly!
Ashleys last blog post..The BEST Summer Weather!
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By Domestic Spaz on Jun 27, 2008 | Reply
I totally covet these Pottery Barn rooms. I want one or five of my own. Alas, it will not be happening any time soon.
Domestic Spazs last blog post..Fighting the Frump with Drink Mixes
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By Soliloquy on Jun 27, 2008 | Reply
Dang, girl.
That was FUNNY!
You’re doing such an awesome job with photoshop!
I’m jealous.
BTW - LOVING the Wordpress switch. Good call.
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By Stephanie on Jun 27, 2008 | Reply
Oh you’re hilarious.
I too get the pottery barn mags. The thing that gets me is how they literally send the exact same catalog every single time.
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By Sugar on Jun 28, 2008 | Reply
I know those people and they are seriously in debt. They are playing catch up all the time. Catch up to the other neighbors. Catch up on the credit card payments. Catch up on the next catalog… on and on and on. And ever three to four months, I walk over to all of their yard sales and buy all their cool stuff for like twenty dollars. Yep, I love Potter Barn. And I love my in-debt-to-the-max friends, God Bless’Em
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By jennyonthespot on Jun 29, 2008 | Reply
Those outdoorsets… all I can think about is how to keep them clean. Crazy.
jennyonthespots last blog post..A post? Today?!
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By Amber on Jul 2, 2008 | Reply
I agree with Sugar. I love to buy their ‘expensive’ stuff at yard sales a few months later.
That’s crazy for the price of a kids room. I live at the beach so I see a lot of those nicer patio sets like that. I don’t have one, and I so wish I did sometimes. Nice spot for a ‘mommy’ break.
Ambers last blog post..Fun at the Beach
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By Debby Phillips on Jul 2, 2008 | Reply
I love the last picture! I kept that same picture out when I got the magazine in the mail so I could look at all of the time! I will see you at BlogHer in a couple of weeks! WOO HOO!
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By Stephanie on Jul 6, 2008 | Reply
Have you seen the Pottery Barn living rooms where they turn all the books so that the spines face the interior of the bookshelf, thereby showcasing all the matching pages? It almost makes me want to hate Pottery Barn. Just a little. Almost. Except for that dining room table I really want. And a few light fixtures.
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By Kids on Mar 16, 2009 | Reply
Is this American?
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