continued from this post…
I lug my bag out of the house, down the stairs, and to the curb where my girlfriends are waiting inside Meg’s minivan, which will be transporting us away from kids, husbands and chores for a whole weekend.
Meg presses a button and, as if by magic, the back door magically rises.
I peer inside. There’s so much space! I toss my bag inside, wave one last time at Jay and CJ, and climb in back. Meg throws the van into Drive and points us towards freedom.
The music plays, my seat reclines, and we are young again.
As it turns out, this trip is the beginning of the end.
The beginning of my amazed admiration for the thing best known as the minivan, and the end of my snobbery against this harbinger of practicality.
We make the 7+ hour round trip in absolute and utter comfort.
And when I return, I start looking at my little BMW in a whole new light. A less rose-colored and more skeptical light.
$100 for an oil change? Who has that kind of money?!
It’s so SMALL. So crowded.
I can’t even fit CJ’s bike in the trunk!
And Costco? Ikea? I have to PLAN these trips to make sure I can actually fit my purchases in the car.
Yeah sure it can zip around the city at delightful speeds, but the cup holders leave a LOT to be desired.
And you and I both know that it’s ALL about the cup holders.
I find myself watching for minivans as I drive around Seattle. I notice the people who drive them.
Hmm, she’s actually cute. Stylish. Not at all lame.
I started noticing models and makes and colors and body types. I even started reading about them online.
Here’s the thing. Taking a road trip in a minivan is akin to just having one Dorito, or spending a weekend at a friend’s house with HDTV, or getting your hair done at the really high-end salon, just this once.
When you get a taste of something good… you’re gonna want more.
Suddenly I find that I’m thinking about cars differently.
Why do I put some much emphasis on the outside?
Isn’t it the inside that actually matters? Because aside from walking out to your car in the parking lot, the number of times that you actually SEE the outside of your car is pretty limited. The inside, on the other hand, is something you get highly intimate with.

There’s a greater life lesson here, I just know it.
Outside, inside… oh never mind.
So anyway, this weekend I find myself at a Honda dealership saying the UNTHINKABLE,
“we want to look at the minivans.”
We look at minivans.
And, you know? The minivans speak to me. The cup holders… the heated seats… the GPS… the rear backup camera… the infinitely flexible seat arrangements opportunities… the cup holders (all 12 of them)…
It’s like the whole inside of that Honda Odyssey is just calling out my name.
Jennnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyyy!!!
How can I say no?
And so I buy one. (gulp)
Step away from the unsubscribe button. I’m bound and determined to prove that you CAN be cool and drive a minivan.
As a start, I’ve designed my very own series of bumper stickers. Check ‘em out.
And that, my friends, is the story of how I became less cool but more responsible in one single day.
The end.
(but isn’t it really the beginning?!)
***
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xo Jen




May 21, 2008 at 9:41 pm
So what you trying to say is that minivans are, like, the new BMW’s????
Sweet. I am seriously coveting the new Dodge Caravans, but I have yet to look at one up close. *sigh* Someday!
May 21, 2008 at 9:46 pm
We almoooost went with a minivan..but got a Pacifica instead..almost as big..got the auto back door that I love and the cupholders and almost the space.
May 21, 2008 at 9:54 pm
Isn’t it hard…growing up?
Love the bumper stickers!
Oh yeah…what crunchy carpets said. Me too.
May 21, 2008 at 10:24 pm
Ladieeeeees, we have our designated driver for June 5th!! :D
May 21, 2008 at 11:11 pm
Ah-ha! I just KNEW you’d come over to the dark side! My Dodge Caravan had me at those automatic doors too! Like I said, don’t knock it ’til you try it. Welcome to the club!
May 22, 2008 at 12:02 am
come to the dark side, we have cupholders.
Love the new bumperstickers!
May 22, 2008 at 12:39 am
I’m embarrassed to say that I only aspire to owning a minivan someday…with the press of a button doors that open – lots of room to get in and out easily … I’m getting way too excited here.
Whenever we go on vacation we always rent one, I always ask my friends who own them to drive.
I think I need to get out more if this is what I’m dreaming about these days.
May 22, 2008 at 4:43 am
I used to be just like you. I swore I would never, EVER drive a minivan. But necessity took over (3 kids…2 car seats and a booster) and I HAD to get one. But you know what? I secretly love it!
May 22, 2008 at 5:31 am
Love this part: “Taking a road trip in a minivan is akin to just having one Dorito…” Very funny.
Yes, I too am one of those “never say never” mamas who went with the Honda Odyssey back in November. While I can’t say I love it, cause yes, I’d rather be driving my old SUV, I must say that the comfort and convenience certainly outweigh it’s lack of “coolness”. With baby number three coming in August, it was a no brainer.
May 22, 2008 at 6:06 am
I knew you were going to say you got one :-)
My SIL has one of the Caravans and she loves it.
You are so cute ;-)
Come see what I have for you.
May 22, 2008 at 6:24 am
I’m not a “car” kind of girl so buying a minivan wasn’t as painful as it is for some moms. Mine is old and doesn’t have all the great features you are talking about with your new one. I’m jealous! Sounds like a great purchase!
Btw, LOVE the bumper stickers!! For the one, I think you should add the word MINIVAN to the top and then put the “You Know You Want One” part.
May 22, 2008 at 6:32 am
The kool-aid tastes good, hm?
Consider it a new goal in life….to get guys to check you out while driving a mini-van. If that isn’t the ultimate MILF statement, I don’t know what it.
May 22, 2008 at 6:48 am
I’m with you – For years I resisted, and now – we’ve got more kids, and I find myself saying things like “Oooh, I really like THAT van – Don’t you?” and “We really need to look into a minivan when it’s time to get rid of the car.” **Shudder**
Great post(s)
May 22, 2008 at 7:04 am
Ewwww! A mini-van?! :) Okay, I’ll admit, I rode in the Honda Odessy my friend has and WOW! I was almost turned. But alas, we weren’t shopping for a new car at the time. I am still determined to hold out and not get a mini-van. My husband wants one though. And this might be the last season for one for our cars. So we’ll see…
May 22, 2008 at 7:24 am
I’m eyeing the Honda CRV… and then the gas prices make me think again. We just did a roadtrip (7hrs one way) with 2 kids and the dog… Thule bag on top, dog in the hatch of our VW Golf. Fun times.
May 22, 2008 at 7:34 am
I have many friends with a Honda Odyssey and they all love it to death!!
I have lots of room in the Land Cruiser, but your 12 cup holders is freakin awesome. Cup holders are a bit of a thing with me.
Very exciting I say – and I love the stickers!!
May 22, 2008 at 7:47 am
So you drank the minivan Koolaid, huh?
Actually, I can sort of understand it. They’re so practical.
May 22, 2008 at 8:32 am
I’m waiting on an Odyssey. My in-laws have one, my cousin-in-laws have one, my sis-& bro-in-law have one. I’m not envious…. I’m just waiting patiently for mine. First I’m getting a 3000 sq ft, 5 bedroom house. We have to have our priorities straight, right?
May 22, 2008 at 8:33 am
Oh yes, I remember the minivan angst! LOL I’ve been ‘converted’ for nearly 2 yrs now. Once you go minivan, you don’t go back!!
I love my van- it’s perfect for this stage of my life. Plus I don’t get the “a SUV is more sexy than a minivan” idea? I see just as many pajama-wearing moms just out of SUVs as minivans at the school dropoff in the AM. Cars are cars…I think I’m pretty sexy (when I wanna be LOL)…and the Dearest hasnt’ complained about lack of sexiness yet!
I love the bumper stickers…I ended up personalizing my Oddy too. making it mine>
May 22, 2008 at 8:36 am
Welcome to the club!
And you know what…minivan screams kids, which screams I’m in a hurry, which screams get out of my way…and it works. People seem to just move for you. And if they don’t, it’s got enough pickup and go to haul a**!
Good luck!
May 22, 2008 at 8:37 am
LOL…pretty funny way of putting that. I dont think I’ve thought bad about the minivan…its just I have these impressions of them being massive. This is why I dont like driving SUV’s or trucks.
May 22, 2008 at 9:06 am
I love love love this post!! I always say to people, “But when I’m inside I forget it’s a minivan.” I loooove the automatic doors!!
I totally want those bumperstickers!
May 22, 2008 at 9:39 am
i was so tempted when i bought my new car. were i as smart as you seem to be-i would have. i predict i’ll buy a minivan within three years.
May 22, 2008 at 9:44 am
Even though you have a minivan and are now trying to convert me, I still adore you. In fact, I like you even more since you didn’t use any of those offensive belittling- of-me tactics that the people who come to my door trying to convert me always use. ;)
I see the merits, I do. But I just. don’t. think. I. can. drive. one.
Of course, I’ve never tried.
And I’m very happy for you.
And if we ever took a roadtrip together, you’d have to carry half the luggage and all the coolers, and I’d have no snacks, so I guess I’ll just sit quietly on my hands here. Anyway, it’s pretty much a given that you are cooler than me, whatever you drive.
May 22, 2008 at 10:03 am
*snort* we seriously did just get rid of ours, in favor of a toyota camry. but then — i’m practically empty-nested, so this makes perfect sense.
looooooove the bumper stickers, though. i’d totally put one on my minivan.
if i had one.
May 22, 2008 at 10:31 am
I drool whenever I see an ad for the latest greatest minivan. They have some seriously cool features. Alas, I’m stuck with my 4-door sedan until it dies.
I can’t wait to hear how you settle in!
May 22, 2008 at 10:48 am
You had me at cup holders. I came this close to getting a Toyota Sienna, but my husband wouldn’t get it because the salesman wouldn’t deal. So I got stuck with another SUV, when I really wanted the mini van even though I swore I would never get one.
May 22, 2008 at 2:41 pm
Welcome to the dark side.
I LOVE my Odyssey.
And I am very jealous that you have the NEW IMPROVED Odyssey. And the power doors save me on a daily basis.
May 22, 2008 at 3:03 pm
I’m laughing because I went through the same admiration last year. The family we carpool with got an Odyssey and I had to have one. I never did but I still think they are pretty cool!
May 22, 2008 at 4:34 pm
Congrats! Lol we are biting the bullet and going Caravan shopping this weekend. Oregon Dad says we can trade the monster gas sucking truck in. By next week, I too could be meshing cool and mini-van. :)
Cheers!
Jamie
May 22, 2008 at 5:32 pm
Welcome to the Odyssey club. It’s like having a Mac — you know it’s better than everything else but you just don’t want to be all snooty about it.
It’s truly amazing what you can haul in the back of those things. But my favorite thing is actually the tight turn radius. I can make illegal U-turns all over town because it turns so well.
May 22, 2008 at 5:36 pm
Jenny (love that name, by the way)…
I gave over to the call of the minivan in my early 30′s as well. It took until this last fall to get a rockin’ minivan though – the Odyssey. I love her so mauch.
Yes, I wanted some thing sexier… something that didn’t scream “Mom on Board!”, but…. BUT – like you said – the cup holders, the seat warmers… the friggin’ doors that open for you like you have your own genie. Golly.
I must admit though, the MAIN reason I minivanned… sliding doors. I NEVER worry about my kids banging another person’s car. THAT is luxury for my mind…
P.S. LOVE the bumper stickers – ESPECIALLY the first one. Genius.
May 22, 2008 at 5:43 pm
Know exactly what you mean, ‘cept I’m trying to talk myself into something much scarier, now that my ten-year-old’s legs are as long as mine. We’ve got 5 kids and two adults, which means every seat is taken.
Guess what comes after the minivan? That’s right…A 12 or 15 passenger van.
Never thought I’d have to have a beeping sound to back up my ride.
May 22, 2008 at 6:14 pm
(start Emperor’s voice)”At last your journey to the Dark Side is complete!” (end Emperor’s voice)
Muahahahahaha!!!! Told ja!
I lurrve my Caravan.
May 22, 2008 at 6:16 pm
Oh, man… I can’t believe I’m about the 5 trillionith person to use the damn Dark Side comment….
(read the other comments BEFORE you type, Maureen….)
May 22, 2008 at 7:09 pm
I’m so proud of you.
May 22, 2008 at 8:23 pm
Ha! I love this post. Just love it!
Because before we were minivan drivers, we weren’t. And we had to be convinced.
We have the Odyssey. I love it.
I like to pretend I’m sexy and cool, and that people think I’m the nanny.
And I do still get checked out.
Rock it, woman!!
May 22, 2008 at 10:08 pm
We have the Odyssey too. Yeah, I used to say I’d never get one, but that was before I had kids, when I didn’t fully appreciate the automatic-door-goodness. My favorite feature is the mirror for spying on the kids. I think it’s officially called the “conversation mirror.” Have ya tried it?
May 22, 2008 at 10:46 pm
AAAAAMEN! I love the likening taking a road trip in a minivan to eating a lonely Dorito. That’s what happened to us and we’ve been a minivan family since 2001. GAH. I love those bumper stickers. I think I need one.
May 23, 2008 at 7:15 am
Seriously? The automatic door thing really has me thinking!
May 23, 2008 at 10:35 am
i am hot.
i drive a minivan.
end of story.
ahahaha
May 23, 2008 at 8:17 pm
Every time I hit the automatic door openers on my Chrysler Town & Country, it’s like I hear angels sing. BRILLIANT!!! Every time we go to visit family, and the debate starts on how many cars do we have to take to get everyone to dinner, I do my stealth ninga moves and WHAM! seating for 7. Their jaws literally drop.
Welcome to the world of Cool Minivan Moms. You rock!
May 25, 2008 at 5:31 am
I KNOW! I drank the kool-aid too. I love my Odyssey and all it’s cupholders. I love the ability to WALK not climb into the back to break up wars and rumors of wars.
And remember ladies, from the inside it doesn’t look like a minivan.
May 25, 2008 at 8:19 pm
Where can I get one of your bumper stickers? Very cute! Welcome to the minivan club… I joined a year and a half ago and can’t imagine going back!
May 26, 2008 at 12:03 am
Sometimes I’m tempted to go toward the light…but I’m not there yet. You make a good argument, though!
I could use more cupholders, and separate zones for each child sounds like a dream.
June 3, 2008 at 4:06 pm
Hi from one Jenny to another! Holly sent me over here to read about your mini-van dilemma. I can so relate…Though I’ve gone the reverse direction.
Waaayyyy back in the late 80′s, we had a spiffy new car–they’d just started making them. They were called Acuras ;-) . I LOVED our Acura. But then after a couple of years I got pregnant and we got rid of the acura and got a Volvo station wagon. I SWORE I would NEVER get a station wagon so feel as if I betrayed my teenaged soul. Esp b/c it was one of the very spartan Volvos as they all were at the time.
With kid #2 we broke down and got a mini-van. Not only a mini-van but an American-made one. I SWORE I would NEVER buy American-made because all of our cars growing up broke down constantly and my first car–a Renault Alliance that *had* been the Car of the Year the year before I bought it became the Worst Car of the Year after GMC took over the brand. I called it the Appliance and all it did was gush transmission fluid.
Okay, so I got sold on the Chrysler Town & Country mini-van. It had a TV in it. How could you not love it (this was so cutting edge back in the early 90′s). Oh, but true to its reputation, the thing sucked, the transmission died early in its life, I detested it’s existence.
Next vehicle: Honda Odyssey. Silver b/c it was the only one available for like an entire year. The Most Common Car On the Highways. Well, it was a Honda so I trusted it b/c our Hondas were always reliable (the Hondas were the 2nd cars we had). But it was, no two ways about it, a mini-van. And with the many parking lot dinks in it it now looks like a semi-crushed Budweiser can.
So….last summer chrysler finally died it’s last death (2nd transmission, 180,000 miles). Just as we found out a friend was about to buy his employees sporty red celica convertible. But then he didn’t buy it. and we did. and it was going to be a scissor-paper-rock my husband every day to see who gets to drive it, but now he hates it, so I get to drive it and I LOVE it. But honestly, I’ll admit, it’s so impractical. And my kids HATE when I pick them up from school in it b/c whoever is wedged in the back is very uncomfortable. And it’s impossible to grocery shop with it. In the winter I’ll just open the roof, plunk the excess bags in the car and drive home with the heater blasting and roof down (no trunk room).
But after driving mini-vans and station wagons for nearly 18 years, I’ll take those minor discomforts, thank you ;-)
(but in your defense, mini-vans these days are awfully plush!)
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