I have a secret
March 28, 2008 – 2:11 amA lot of you are encouraging me to post pictures of me in my new clothes.
And I’d like to, really I would.
Only I can’t.
The thing is, I haven’t been entirely honest with you.
I have a secret.
Can you guess what it is?
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Mother. Coffee drinker. Information seeker. Skeptic. Creative. Dreamer. Schemer. Absolutely Bananas.
By Maureen on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
You’re preggers and the A-Line skirt will never fit….
Right?
Right???
What do I win?
By the supermama on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
You’re actually a man? Tell tell I’m dying to know!
By Rhiannon on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
You are totally knocked up, aren’t you?
OR! I know! You got a boob job!
By Suburban Oblivion on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
OMG, are you pregnant????
You will still be going to BlogHer if you are, right?? I’ll be so sad if you don’t
By Velveteen Mind - Megan on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
I would love it if you were going to say, “Because my hips are as wide as Megan’s” but no, you must be pregnant!
And if you aren’t pregnant but your hips and butt have turned ghetto, I’m totally down with that, too.
By Mamma on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
Wait! Is there going to be a baby in the room with us???
By Kim on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
The suspense is killing me? Are you preggers? You’re only going to feed my baby fever!
By Amanda on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
You secretly only have the top half of your body, because the bottom half was gnawed off by a hungry shark back in 1996? Am I remotely close?
By Mrs. Flinger on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
You dyed your hair black with red streaks, you got a nose ring, a tattoo and leather pants you haven’t been able to pull off in three days.
By Stephanie on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
Well, now. Why would go out and buy structured pieces if you are preggers? That’s just being cruel to yourself. Please tell me you aren’t torturing yourself with clothing you can’t wear. I’d have to drive up to Seattle and talk some sense into you.
Other guesses…Lasik surgery (you know, with the other part of that money you ‘came into’) and/or pink hair. It’s one way of coping with this wretched Pac NW weather.
By The MomBabe on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
ummm, you broke your camera and you’re waiting for a new one?
Otherwise, I don’t know.
By debawriter on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
I agree with Stephanie. Why would you spend money on clothes you couldn’t wear if you were pregnant.
BUT, maybe they’re structured MATERNITY pieces?
Please tell us, tell us now!
Deb
sandiegomomma.com
By fussy on Mar 27, 2008 | Reply
Preggers?
Preggers?
Preggers?
Wait….are you preggers?
By K on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
you just dont want us to see you in your pretty new clothes? Am I right or are you actually preggers?
C xx
By MommyTime on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
I’m obviously the FIRST to guess correctly that you are PREGNANT and these are MATERNITY clothes!! Hooray for me!!
Hooray for you! Congratulations. And if you’re not pregnant, then congratulations on being hired by the CIA and purchasing their entire line of spy-wear, which is why you can’t tell us your secret. Well, you could tell us. But then you’d have to kill us.
By Dan on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
You lost both your legs in a threshing machine accident?
By ktjrdn on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
You felt guilty for spending the money and took them all back?
Am I the only one that does that?
By Peter Hill on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
CJ will be asking lots of questions. CA asked me the chicken and egg question, only it was mommies and babies. grats if we all guessed right.
By Jen on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
Well I was to be original and guess that you are pregnant but I guess that I’m about 12 hours too late for that. So I guess I’m going to guess that you lied about buying structured peices and a-line skirts and you really bought sweat pants and mumus. (Because you’re pregnant.)
By The Whiteheads on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
You are afraid we will all recognize that your new wardrobe is actually from J Jill and reveal to you husband that you actually spent 4x the amount he thought you did at Target.
Or you are pregnant….
By Sister Honey Bunch on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
Do you live in a van down by the river and don’t want us to know?
Or are you really famous and the picture on your blog isn’t you?
Or, hey, are you pregnant?
By Midwest Mommy on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
you lied about buying clothes and you really just bought 7 bags of chocolate! That’s what I would have done
By Carla on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
I am going to guess that a bambino is on the way!!!
I’ll be happy with something photoshopped though.
By Ali on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
i’m a sheep.
baa.
pregnant?
By Queen of Shake-Shake on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
I hate to be in the majority, so I won’t guess it’s a pregnancy secret.
I’m going with the camera secret
By Trenches of Mommyhood on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
You were shopping for MATERNITY clothes, weren’t cha?
By Danielle on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
I’ll take boob job for $500, Alex…..
By Heather on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
You felt guilty about spending money so took all the clothes back.
By Baby Mamma aka Tamra on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
Um, you had a hair coloring fiasco.
You accidently threw out all 7 bags with the trash.
The cat hacked up on them. (If you have a cat)
You gave them to your sister. (If you have a sis)
They’re all swimsuits and you hate getting pics taken of yourself in a swimsuit.
They’re from the junior section and you don’t want to admit you can’t fit in ‘em.
By Christine @ Serenity How? on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
Wow, everyone else came up with such clever and interesting guesses. I was just going to say something boring like you were in major denial and bought a size or so too small.
I do the “buyers remorse” thing myself. I see I’m not the only one LOL!
By Laural on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
You have the mommy blahs and tried to sex it up a bit with your new wardrobe? So the clothes are a bit, um, indecent to post on the internet?
Well, that’s all I could come up with besides that YOU’RE PREGNANT!
By Chelsea on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
I still can’t figure out how you bought 7 bags of decent clothes at Target, so I’m guessing you embellished that story a little. I love Target and all, but their clothes just don’t fit me well.
By the planet of janet on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
like everyone else, i’m guessing you’re preggers.
if only i had something more original to add, like maybe you really are just a head in a jar and you type with your nose.
but i don’t.
By Smiling Mom on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
A boob job for $500? Dang!! I’m interested in that!
Wait,I get what I pay for, right? OK, then no $500 boob job for me.
How about a baby for $500K? Is that it?
By LikeAstaR on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
are they MATERNITY CLOTHES?
By The Spunky Mommy on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
I’m so bad at these guessing games…do tell!
By Jemma on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
This entire blog is a fiction and you’re actually a 7 foot transvestite from Wales who spends her days grooming her pet ferret.
No?
By Anonymous on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
you’re going to kill us making us wait, aren’t you??!! whoooo hooooo, i’m dyin’ here!
By Annie on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
I had the same thought as everyone else - hurry up and put us out of our misery, k?
By Jemma on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
Hmmm just spotted the calcium chews in the last post. Maybe it is pregnancy after all?
Dammit I was kind of hoping for the 7 foot ferret thing.
By Lisa on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
Gah! Am on the edge of my seat! TELL US! TELL US! TELL US!
By MamaFeelgood on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
Maybe a dingo ate your new clothes?!
By Donielle on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
So seriously….it’s been like 23 hours since you posted that.
OUT WITH IT ALREADY!
Oh, I’m sorry, you may be a bit emotional right now. Or are you not feeling well? Maybe a bit nauseas? Or just really tired? Or maybe just busy eating since you’re so hungry?
We’re dying already!
By Anonymous on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
Let’s see. I will put in a vote for a) you got a job, b) your new job is a model for Target, or c) you are moving to a totally different climate where you will need some completely different types of clothes like bikinis or anoraks. Pregnancy would be just too much of a coincidence!
By carrie on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
WHAT IS IT?
You’re killing me.
By Carrie on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
We’re waiting… Seriously, it’s my birthday. That means you HAVE to end the suspense
By ReesePie on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
It’s GOT to be that you’re pregnant…
By Chelsea on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
This is worse than waiting for a new Lost episode — stop the madness and tell us, already! (please?)
By JaniceNW on Mar 28, 2008 | Reply
You actually turned yellow-the color of bananas-and needed all new clothes to maych your new complexion.
By Anonymous on Mar 29, 2008 | Reply
If your pregnant, why in the world would you go out and buy 7 shopping bags of new clothes???
By A Mom Two Boys on Mar 29, 2008 | Reply
I know! I know!
You don’t like to post pictures of yourself.
Oh wait. Crap.
By Chilihead on Mar 29, 2008 | Reply
You took the clothes back. No?
You didn’t really go shopping. No?
What? You’re pregnant? That’s fantastic!
By HRH on Mar 29, 2008 | Reply
Spill it…
By MCmommy on Mar 29, 2008 | Reply
Oooh!!! I’m going to be the BIG WINNER because I’ve figured it out! You see….you want us to believe you are pregnant….you may even TELL us you are pregnant. HOWEVER, your timing is perfect and I am so onto you. Because on Monday, APRIL 1ST you are going to tell us APRIL FOOL’S!!!!! ha ha ha
By Zaya on Mar 29, 2008 | Reply
I’m guessing that because it’s still cold you haven’t gotten any color yet, so you are afraid of blinding us with ghostly white legs… That’s always my reason this time of year.