(no, I’m not talking about a toxic lemon-scented cleaner, although that’d be a good guess…)
After reading some excellent New Year’s resolutions, I have decided to throw my hat into the ring.
So here goes… let’s hope I can keep ‘em!
1) Laugh at myself at least once every day. And furthermore, I commit to you, my dearest friends, relatives (gak!) and readers, that I will share my humiliation publicly so that you can laugh WITH me!
2) Start slipping the word “snap” into my everyday conversation. I don’t know why, but I just love it when people say “oh snap.” I want to be one of those people! (see how quickly I’m living up to my FIRST resolution?)
3) Figure out which presidential candidate I want to vote for. Or at least gather enough information to SOUND LIKE I know which one I want to vote for. Or at least figure out WHO IS RUNNING. (President? Is someone running for president?)
4) Convince people to give me free stuff. I’m still reeling from my failure to get a free Roomba… and why should I have to buy my own Wii? Don’t these people know I’m a BLOGGER?!
5) Implement new, HIGHLY AMUSING telemarketer response strategies. Because shouting SHUT UP YOU SCUM-SUCKING LOWLIFE! into the receiver before hanging up has gotten rather dull.
6) Get older. Oh snap I am SO all over this one what with the turning 30 and all.
Ok, now you really need to go read this post and this one too for even BETTER and (more importantly) FUNNIER resolutions. And after that, come on over to SMB and let’s talk about our blogging resolutions!
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xo Jen
January 2, 2008 at 10:20 pm
I can help with 3 and 5
3. Bill Richardson
5. I am going to try and convince them to save the world!! By mentioning obscure “green” knowledge, like PVC is poisenous, or that their is a floating island of trash in the pacific that is bigger than texas, or …
Well anyways, goodluck with your resolutions!!!
January 2, 2008 at 10:21 pm
Oh snap. I like. Can I steal it?
Angie
http://www.AllAdither.com
January 2, 2008 at 11:24 pm
Jenny, my resolution is to say “Sistah Girl” more often. I think that and your “oh snap” would make us get along swimmingly.
January 3, 2008 at 12:32 am
Delurking to say…Ive been trying to use “snap” in place of more hmmm…vulgar, choice, preferable to me (not really but they sure are easy to say)…for way to long. Good luck girl.
January 3, 2008 at 1:15 am
Birthday’s lose a lot of appeal after 30. Sigh..
January 3, 2008 at 5:13 am
Oh Snap!
can we just say it for no reason even?
January 3, 2008 at 6:20 am
On #4…you can try…I was told that my free Swiffer Vac would arrive during the 3rd week of December…still waiting…
#5…the phrase “Sorry she/he is dead” has worked well for me. I have a friend that asks for their name and home number so that he can return their call later….They hate that….
Happy New Year!
January 3, 2008 at 7:00 am
You know, I really need to get better at laughing at myself, too. I take myself way too seriously, as my husband proves on a daily basis.
Assertagirl
January 3, 2008 at 8:25 am
Hmm, that deciding on a president one is alluring.
Cody said the word caucas last night and I thought he was referring to something yucky.
January 3, 2008 at 11:06 am
hey…i need someone to give me free stuff too…how can we make that happen???!! :)
thanks for the shout-out…i blush!
January 3, 2008 at 11:22 am
“oh snap” becomes infinitely more annoying when you have a 7 year old that says it all.the.time.
January 3, 2008 at 12:08 pm
Those are some great resolutions! My favorite is number 2. We should all strive slip the word “snap” into our everyday conversation. The world would definitely be a more amusing place!
January 3, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Since you’re turning all of 30 I guess Oh! Snap! is good. I must tell you that it is totally OUT with the high school kids. LOL.
January 3, 2008 at 1:08 pm
Oh snap, I didn’t know this was the new cool slang. And I thought I was cool.
Great resolutions. Happy New Year!
January 3, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Enough already about turning 30, you youngun’ you!
LOVE “Oh snap”! It fits right in with my resolution to stop cussing!
January 3, 2008 at 4:57 pm
I would be all over saying “oh snap” if it didn’t come out of the boy’s mouths at least 10 times a day.
But the telemarketer response thing is super cool. My Dad always asks for their home number so that he can interrupt their evening.
I’m just not that quick, I’m afraid.
Oh snap.
January 3, 2008 at 5:09 pm
I love the “Oh Snap” resolution! I would also LOVE to convince people to send me free stuff! LOL
January 3, 2008 at 9:13 pm
I just started incorporating “suh-NAP” into my vocabulary, only half the time I get so excited about bringing it out that I say “suh-MACK!”
Fuh-shizzle. Since my son and his friends grew up, I’m out of the slang loop.
January 4, 2008 at 12:18 am
These are some of the best I’ve seen. Thanks for the giggles :-)
January 4, 2008 at 7:19 am
Oh, snap! I hate getting older and none of those presidential candidates are worthy of my vote. I’m tired of voting for the lesser of two evils every election…
January 4, 2008 at 8:18 am
Fantastic resolutions!!
May a steal a few?? Or all??
:)
Happy New Year! Love your blog!
- Audrey
Pinks & Blues
http://www.pinksandblues.com
January 4, 2008 at 10:21 am
Now these are what I call resolutions!! Love ‘em!
I need to get on a presidential bandwagon, too… there are too many to choose from right now!!
Happy New Year!
Jane, Pinks & Blues
January 4, 2008 at 11:27 am
You are officially my new favorite blogger! Thanks for the photoshop laughs!!
January 4, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Watch Chicken Little 205 times like I have and #2 will be a breeze.
January 4, 2008 at 3:33 pm
I love all of your resolutions! They are a lot more interesting than mine :D
Oh snap is good… because snizzle my dizzle is officially dead.;)
January 8, 2008 at 3:29 pm
30 is the new 20.
Nice list.
January 10, 2008 at 1:37 am
My favorite method that I’ve ever heard of for dealing with telemarketers requires a talkative child. Just hand the phone to the kid and tell them the person wants to hear all about their day at preschool (or their latest toy car obsession, or whatever). I haven’t tried it myself (my kids aren’t that talkative), but just thinking about it makes me giggle.