A while back I started a List of all the things I want to do, long-term. And seeing as how I’ve quit my job, am almost 30, and theoretically have more time to pursue happiness, fulfillment, and otherwise check items off my list, I decided I’d better get down to business.
So, I signed up for a yoga class. I have very minimal yoga experience, which is completely comprised of trying to follow along with some blond lady on a video who’s doing yoga on top of the Grand Canyon (I think it’s the Grand Canyon… I’ve never actually been there)… And while videos are fun and all that, you really can only get so far with the same exact workout day in and day out. Plus the instructor was really unfriendly; it was almost as if I wasn’t there. I don’t think she likes me much. Hence, the class.
First question of the day; what to wear. What I can tell you (POST yoga class) is what NOT to wear.
Do not wear to yoga: Baggy t-shirt. For a very simple reason; a large number of yoga poses involve a version of standing on your head. When you stand on your head in a baggy t-shirt, your shirt falls over your face, and your belly hangs down. Not exactly the perfect scenario for true yoga enlightenment, relaxation, and ease- let me assure you.
Something else I learned is in reference to yoga mats. Being the gung-ho girl that I am, I’d gone to Target and purchased a pretty purple yoga mat. I will blend in! I will look like a pro! I have my own mat! Yoga mats are great, and definitely a critical item. However, if you are part of the 2% of the human population that has sweaty palms (I am), you may need to make your mat purchasing decision cautiously. Otherwise you’ll end up like I did, face down for every pose.
For example, we go into “downward facing dog.” (If you’re unfamiliar with this pose, basically your body makes a giant triangle, with your butt up in the air and your hands and feet on the ground).
The perfectly toned instructor says, “downward facing dog” and everyone moves into that position, including yours-truly. After only a couple of seconds, I feel my palms start to move under me. Next thing I know, SLIIIP, I am face down in what I like to call “Flat on a mat” pose. “Flat on a mat” rapidly became my most frequently utilized pose. And while it was somewhat comfortable (lying prostrate usually is), I don’t think it really benefits my muscles much.
This type of situation is a perfect example of why real-life classes are superior to DVDs. While the blond grand-canyon instructor never ONCE offered to help me in my “Flat on a mat” plight, the real-life instructor would come around to gently correct our misshapen forms. When she saw me in “flat on a mat,” she told me that there are special mats for the very sweaty, called Eco-mats. Who knew?? I grabbed myself an eco-mat and suddenly “downward facing dog” STAYED “downward facing dog.” Hallelujah! This is progress!
Despite my minor setbacks (which really I’ve learned to expect any time I undertake anything involving coordination), I completely enjoyed the class. I walked out feeling refreshed, rejuvenated, and aware of muscles that I had forgotten I had. Already I’m picturing my new self after a few more classes… I’ll be the talk of the town with amazing flexibility, enviable muscle tone, and an overpowering sense of calm. I feel a Photoshop moment coming on!
Namaste.
Originally posted on 5/1/07
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xo Jen
December 26, 2007 at 4:17 pm
OMG, you and I are practically the same person. My first yoga class was downright hysterical, although I tried my darndest to look cool doing Warrior One and Shataranga, which I’ve yet to master.
December 26, 2007 at 4:19 pm
This was one of my very first blog entries — it’s a yoga poem of sorts:
http://craftycassie.blogspot.com/2006/01/yoga-free-verse.html
December 26, 2007 at 4:52 pm
I’ve tried yoga exactly one time, whereupon I discovered that I do not possess a core. No core; just a flabby glob of internal organs. I think I delivered my core right along with my last child. Sigh. I sure wish the “full-figured woman” body shape would come back in style.
December 26, 2007 at 7:14 pm
Just wait until somebody farts in your yoga class. Just try not to crack up then, I dare ya!
ps. don’t use hand lotion before class either — I don’t think even an eco-mat could hold up to that! :)
December 26, 2007 at 7:45 pm
LAUGHED OUT LOUD!!! Not AT you, but imagining ME doing all these things!
HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Hope the 2nd class goes better!
December 26, 2007 at 8:22 pm
What DO you wear to Yoga? I have no idea. I am a yoga idiot.
And why does everyone love yoga? I will have to try it sometime, because it just seems really, really reeeeeallly uncomfortable.
December 27, 2007 at 9:59 pm
I made the same clothing error in my first yoga class as well! I thought baggy was good, and comfortable. Until my belly started hanging out…
I figured it out though, and have been practicing yoga for five years. I still collapse after class sometimes, but in a good way!