This morning I am trying to get CJ out the door to preschool. As usual, we are running ever-so-slightly behind.
Me: CJ, let’s put on your socks and shoes, and then we can go.
CJ: No, YOU put on my socks.
OK…. I’m not gonna fight it… just get him out the door…
I expertly pull on his socks.
Me: Alright, let’s go!
CJ carefully examines the socks, flexing and pointing his toes and running his fingers over the contours of his foot.
CJ: But MOMMY, I feel a BUMP!
Noooooooo!!!!!
Maybe if I ignore it, he’ll stop… it’s never worked before, but WHO KNOWS!
I get my purse. I say NOTHING.
CJ: MOMMY! I feel a tiny bump! Right THERE!
I still say nothing.
CJ: MOMMMMMMY!!! LISTEN TO ME!
Yeah, the ignoring thing isn’t working. Shocker.
Me: CJ, if you just pretend it’s not there, it’ll go away.
CJ: BUT MOMMY THERE’S A BUMP AND I CAN FEEL IT!!!
aaaarrrggghhhh!!!
CJ: I want my SKELETON socks!
Me: But your skeleton socks are dirty, CJ. How about if I wash them today and you can wear them tomorrow.
CJ: BUT I WANT THEM NOW!!! THIS SOCK HAS A TINY BUMP THAT I CAN FEEL! (he rips of the offending sock and throws it at me)
Me: Well, run downstairs and get the skeleton socks. You can wear them dirty.
CJ goes downstairs. A few minutes later he re-emerges WITHOUT the socks.
Me: CJ! Where are the skeleton socks?
We are now OFFICIALLY very late.
CJ: They were dirty.
Me: I KNOW they’re dirty… I TOLD YOU that!
You know? I can’t even remember how the story ends. Which is funny because it just happened this morning. I must have blocked it out of my mind… you know, because of the trauma and all.
But seriously, I am at my WIT’S END with the sock battles. We have them EVERY MORNING. Well, except the mornings when the skeleton socks are actually clean. Which is rare.
Why is clothing this child SUCH a battle?
Why can’t he be more PASSIVE and OBEDIENT?
The Battle of the Tiny Bump just might do me in.
Which is a rather pathetic way to go, done in by a TINY BUMP in a four-year old’s sock. But there it is.
GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD!!!!
***
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xo Jen
December 11, 2007 at 1:40 pm
Have you tried turning his socks wrong side out? I’m guessing it’s the toe seam that’s bothering him?
December 11, 2007 at 1:46 pm
You just described every week day morning at my house. We are perpetually running late…boots, hats, mittens, coats, me screaming. Good times.
Heather had a good suggestion. See if inside out helps.
December 11, 2007 at 1:52 pm
Ummm…Heather is just way to brilliant. I’ve never thought of doing that. Ow.
December 11, 2007 at 2:20 pm
Would it be possible to buy several more pairs of skeleton socks (all to preserve your sanity, of course)?
December 11, 2007 at 2:29 pm
Eeek, we have similar problems here. the thing that drives me nuts is after every bath… “Mom, I’m cold…” followed by me explaining ad nauseum that wet=cold and
drying off+ jammies= warmth and sane mommy
December 11, 2007 at 2:50 pm
Heather, that’s a great idea. I am TOTALLY trying it. Tulip mom, I think you have a good point too. Problem is the skeleton socks are outrageously over-priced splurge from Nordstrom! Plus they were Halloween items. But maybe it’s time for some new CHRISTMAS socks!
December 11, 2007 at 3:13 pm
My almost-4-year-old does the SAME THING! The seam drives her nuts when it’s crooked. Of course, if her feet would stop growing we wouldn’t have this problem.
December 11, 2007 at 4:48 pm
My brother used to complain about his socks all the time! My mom finally found some brand that didn’t have the toe seam and she bought him those until he moved out of the house!
December 11, 2007 at 5:17 pm
My daughter wears her socks inside out too. She had the same problem with the toe seam.
December 11, 2007 at 5:22 pm
Could you get your hands on more of those skeleton socks? Or maybe you could take him to Nordstrom (they have really cute kids socks that aren’t SO overpriced) and have him pick out more.
‘Course, if it’s not the socks it’ll be something else entirely.
Angie
(www.AllAdither.com)
December 11, 2007 at 8:08 pm
Every morning is like that with Katie. I just stop asking her the following questions:
Do you want clippies or a pony tail?
What do you want to wear?
What shoes do you want to wear?
What would you like for breakfast?
Yup. No. More. Choices.
It’s a cruel, cruel world – the sooner she finds out the better! :)
December 11, 2007 at 10:55 pm
Queenie is brilliant!
Also, the photo is hilarious, as usual. I’ve been taken down by hundreds of sock bumps myself.
Good thing you have extra nog for my egg this year!
love ya, Miss Bananas.
December 11, 2007 at 11:15 pm
I just found your cute blog! What a funny story about the socks… :)
I’m with TulipMom, try to get more skeleton socks.
<3, Amy in AZ
December 12, 2007 at 2:55 am
You are hilarious and I feel your pain. Not only does my four year old have to have her socks perfect but she has to wear the same “outfits.” She has her own ideas about what goes together and don’t even try to tell her differently. At least she is good at matching but heaven forbid she wear a different shirt with the pink pants.
December 12, 2007 at 6:25 am
I had that problem for years! We finally found one brand and bought 6 packs that did not bother her- I wish I had thought to turn them inside out! I have also heard from other parents that there are seamless socks that work well too. You can google it and they are available online.
December 12, 2007 at 7:17 am
Look for seemless socks. This is the only thing that saved my mother from throttling my little brother and his “bump” issue. We still had to pull his socks so tight his toes were curled before putting on his shoes though, lest there was a WRINKLE!
December 12, 2007 at 8:35 am
Your pictures are always just the funniest things ever. Any chance they’re still selling those socks and you can stock up?
December 12, 2007 at 11:17 am
Try having that same dressing arguement with a very opinionated and drama queenish 7 year old girl!
December 12, 2007 at 12:40 pm
Hee hee. No, I swear that I’m not laughing AT you, I’m laughing WITH you. The sock issue adds a good five minutes to our morning routine every day. Then there’s the shirt tag issue and the itchy hat issue and the suddenly too tight underwear issue and the ….. sigh. I need to go lay down now.
December 12, 2007 at 10:21 pm
My six year old Keri has sock bump issues, too. I finally got so fed up with it we went to the store and bought new socks and I told her that was going to be absolutely no complaining. If she claims she has a bump now, I tell her, “You’ll get used to it.”
Good luck!
December 13, 2007 at 2:20 pm
Oh my gosh… my six year old taught my three year old about sock bumps…they drive me nuts… the repositioning, the twisting, the crying, the fighting , the throwing of socks…
and I thought my kids were weird…
December 14, 2007 at 2:24 am
Miss E does this too and she’s seven. I think some kids are just more sensitive to, erm, sock bumps.
February 5, 2008 at 11:03 am
My 7 year old Kate also has the sock bump issue. I thought she was just going through a phase but it’s been going on for three years. I fianlly gave up and started looking for seamless socks. I had no idea there was such a thing until I started looking online. If anyone is interested I found some that she will actually wear at http://www.therawear.com. They are called smartknit kids seamless socks. These socks have saved my sanity in the mornings.