The rule wrecker
August 19, 2007 – 4:46 amMornings at our house can be a battle. The thing is, CJ refuses to eat breakfast. And the further into the morning we get, the hungrier he is. And when he gets hungry, he turns into UNREASONABLE VERY MEAN ORNERY AND DOWNRIGHT NASTY MONSTER CJ. It’s not a pretty thing.
Friday morning was no exception. 9:00 rolled around and he had been up for two hours with not a thing to eat. He was literally snarling.
I put my foot down. “CJ, you must eat breakfast.”
I poured him a bowl of the new Frosted Flakes cereal that he had picked out the day before at the grocery store.
NO I DON’T LIKE THIS CEREAL!!!
I pulled out the freezer waffles.
NO I WILL NOT EAT THOSE I DON’T LIKE THEM!!!
Finally, I want to my emergency stash of chocolate Odwalla granola bars. These almost ALWAYS work. What kid will turn away chocolate? Not this one. Well, at least usually…
I DON’T WANT THAT! I JUST WANT TO BE ALONE!!!
“Ok,” I tell him… “I’ll just leave this granola bar on the table for when you decide you want it.”
LEAVE IT ON THE COUCH!
Yes! I think, He’ll start eating it and the MONSTER will disappear and it’ll be back to my somewhat reasonable CJ again. So I peel back the wrapper and leave the granola bar on the corner of the couch, like a villager dropping off a peace offering to an angry god.
I move into the kitchen and wait for CJ to transform back into a boy.
Suddenly, a flurry of activity. CJ races into the kitchen and I hear something heavy drop into the garbage.
CJ WHAT DID YOU JUST THROW IN THE GARBAGE?!!!
“The granola bar. HA.”
I kid you not, he really said HA.
Now it’s MY turn to transform into SCARY EVIL MONSTER mommy.
THAT’S IT! YOU’RE GOING IN A TIME-OUT FOR TEN MINUTES!!!
Ten minutes later I walked into his room. He was sitting on his bed quietly, and he gave me his biggest, best, most cheesy, I’m-such-a-nice-boy smile.
I put on my best serious face and said, “CJ, do you know why you’ve been in a time-out?”
He didn’t even pause. “Because I wrecked your rule?”
Well that’s one way of putting it.
Maybe the rule thing isn’t working out quite as well as I’d hoped.
***
Finally, thank you to Sunshine for awarding me the Power of Schmooze award, and to Mama Zen and JaniceNW for the Nice Matters Award (at least someone thinks I’m nice!). Ya’ll are too kind!
***
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By JaniceNW on Aug 18, 2007 | Reply
Dod I ever tell you what my friends and I call the fours? The F***ing Fours. It’s a freaking hard year to parent with logic and reason.
Good Luck.
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By bellevelma on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
Now when I was in the 3rd grade, the nuns at my school would have made CJ eat the granola bar right out of the trash. I however, think that is mean and wrong and disgusting.
I’m lauging with you because I have so been there, and it mostly only gets, um… worse. As much as I hate to tell you that, I feel you deserve to know the truth about what lies ahead. So you can be prepared. And self medicate with booze and chocolate. You might want to stock up now.
But hey, the good news is that it was just a granola bar, right? My son once threw his shoesaway because he “didn’t like them anymore!” To teach him a lesson I made him eat them right of the trash. No wait… actually, I LEFT them in the trash and said “Too bad, so sad, you’ll have to go barefoot!”
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By Annie on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
The not eating thing drives me to distraction - then the constant ‘I’m hungry’ chiming after not eating anything that was offered, usually tips me over the edge!
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By Jennifer aka Binky Bitch on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
My son does the same thing! Why won’t they just eat if they’re hungry?
I was hoping this would get better as he got older, it’s not looking good, though.
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By Deb on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
There is a way out for me in this area. If my kids dont eat breakfast at home, they have to eat it at school. Most Maryland schools have FREE breakfast , so if they dont eat something here, I speak to the teacher, and say ” C didnt eat breakfast he needs to eat SOMETHING!”, usually that works. How about having the breakfast stuff set out before bed? Would that help? Also, I always say, whatever you eat I will sprinkle Fairy godmother dust on it… its actually powdered sugar.
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By Misty Dawn on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
Oh my - I’m only a step-mother, but my step-son went through a stage where all he would eat was cereal - for every meal! Then he went through a stage where all he would eat was tuna fish. Now, he still loves his cereal, but isn’t so big on tuna fish anymore (he’s 17 now).
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By chilihead on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
Peanut butter. We ate that for three years straight and it’s still a favorite they ask for.
AND? Oh. My. Word. I was laughing, but only because it wasn’t me. Testing boundaries. Good times.
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By Summer on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
I remember my grandma making me eat food out of the trash when I was younger. I had of course dumped the offensive stuffed (can’t even remember what it was), thinking I was so smart and told her I had eaten it. She checked the trash first thing, took it out and watched me choke down every last bite
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By Jo Beaufoix on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
Well Done on the awards Abs, and hope your little monster eats his breakfast tomorrow.
My little monsters are asleep.
Hooray.
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By Heather on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
More rules = more things to break.
Best keep the rules down to the necessary ones. Less gray hairs that way, I promise.
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By Mommy on Aug 19, 2007 | Reply
My little girl does the same thing! When I was a little girl I refused to eat vegetables or anything that had and substance or was good for me. Now I feel like everything is coming full circle for me and I am getting the ultimate payback….my daughter is the same way and it drives me crazy!!!
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By nell on Aug 20, 2007 | Reply
Freya does that too, the not eating. And thanks for the visuals, it’s hard to get perspective on what I look like when I freak out at them, but this is good, I’ll remember it next time.
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By carrie on Aug 20, 2007 | Reply
This eating thing is going to be the “rule wrecker” in my house too!
Keep trying though!
Carrie
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By Debbie on Aug 20, 2007 | Reply
Jenny, just make lunch food and tell him it’s lunch. Works for Aidan. Well, that and they can’t watch any TV that day if they don’t eat a morning meal.
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By Mamma on Aug 20, 2007 | Reply
I HATE when the catch on.
Dastardly kids!!
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By Rachel on Aug 21, 2007 | Reply
He said HA!! I laughed at this. Mostly because it’s really good to know that someone else’s child does things like this to them! My oldest says “matter-of-fact’! She’s only 6!
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