A bag full of possum
August 25, 2007 – 8:52 pmThis spring, like every spring before, the rains came, followed by the sun, and our grass began to grow.
One bright and sunny Saturday morning, Jay decided that the time had come to mow the lawn. He went into the side yard to pull the lawnmower out of hibernation. Hum dee hum dee hum... He dusted off the few stray leaves and cobweb that had been woven between the handle and base. The birds were chirping and a squirrel ran across the top of the fence. He looked around for the leaf collector bag. Aha! There it is. He picked it up and thought, Hmm, it’s heavy. Must have lots of wet grass still in there. And he turned it upside down to empty it.
THUD! out rolled a BIG FAT POSSUM along with a smattering of dried-up leaves and grass. And my dear husband nearly had a heart attack. This was NOT what he had expected.
The possum sat at his feet, blinking. This wasn’t what he’d expected either. I like to imagine him thinking to himself, hmmph, so that’s it then… hibernation is over, before he slowly stood up and wandered off.
I think we all have moments like these… The “ACK! There’s a possum in my bag!” moments.
Moments where you’re sleepily going about your mundane business when out of nowhere a naked-tailed, red-eyed, unfortunately large RODENT shows up to scare your pants off.
Great! you think (after you stop hyperventilating), now WHAT am I supposed to do about this possum?
***
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By Jo Beaufoix on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
At least it wasn’t a great hulking purple singing dinosaur.
Now that would have been scary.
To be honest I’m not actually sure what a possum looks like, though I have images of wombats, beavers and raccoons in my head.
I’ll have to google one.
hope your hubby has recovered from the shock.
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By Heather on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
See, here down in the South, we’da done cooked that possum up in a stew.
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By HK on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
Possums are uuugly! We don’t have them in my part of the state, but we do have plenty of skunks. We had one wander through our backyard a week ago, so now every time I let the cats in I wonder if I’m about to let in a skunk…
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By andi on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
I didn’t know you had possums there! Ew.
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By Cathy on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
Try one dead possum and two dead baby possums.
In the garage.
In the dead of summer.
The biggest fight I ever had with slacker ex-boyfriend was over who had to remove the carcasses.
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By bellevelma on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
LOL! I hit a possum with my car once. I was so upset. Stupid thing came right out in the middle of the road at night and BAM!
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By Feener on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
ok, i am icked out by the crickets forget a possum
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By Jeana on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
Oh. My. Word.
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By Midwest Mommy on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
I think I would have died! I freaked out when I found a frog on my back step what would I have done if I found a possum hiding somewhere!
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By Suburban Oblivion on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
Freaky!
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By JaniceNW on Aug 25, 2007 | Reply
The past two years we have hosted a raccoon family. They love when the pie cherries are ripe. They do me a great favor by eating them all so I don’t have to step on the cherries and then get it all over my carpet.
We also have many possums here. There’s many more critters than one think here in Western WA.
At least we don’t have any black widows like an unfortunate woman who shall remain nameless. ;)
Jenny~did he have to go get his heart checked out after that?
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By Brillig on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
“I think we all have moments like these… The “ACK! There’s a possum in my bag!” moments.”
Ummm… why… no. I can quite honestly say that I have never EVER had one of those moments.
Hilarious, by the way. I’m so glad that these things happen to you, so that you can write them and entertain us, your adoring fans.
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By Dawn @ Coming to a Nursery Near You on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
Maybe I should send you some of the $5mill to buy some new leaf bags LOL
Thanks for visiting!
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By Mommy Daisy on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
Ohh, great story. That sounds like something that would happen here.
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By LikeAstaR on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
I am glad that it was at least alive and not some dead, stinkin mess.
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By Janine on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
Picture it. Christmas 2005. I went to the attic to get my tree decorations and lifted a box to find the friendly neighborhood bat. To add insult to injury, I managed to step on it…really.
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By carrie on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
I would have peed my pants. No question.
I hate possums.
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By my minivan is faster than yours on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
Last night I was out with my girlfriends, we saw a mouse and screamed. I am I proud? No. Really I thought it was kind of cute but screaming at a bar in public is fun and something I don’t get to do too much, so when the opportunity arose…
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By Alex Elliot on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
My literal possum moment was a few summers ago when I was talking on the phone sitting outside. I heard a noise in the bushes and out came two baby possums. That’s not nearly as funny as your story though!
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By Carrie on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
wow…what a great metaphor. A possum moment. Fabulously philosophical.
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By kara on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
oh my god!
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By Mrs. Mustard on Aug 26, 2007 | Reply
Stew anyone?
Just kidding. I really don’t think I could eat a possum. Ew.
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By mommyzing on Aug 27, 2007 | Reply
Possums are mean mean creatures…and they hiss! I have to say that was hilarious, although if that would have happened to me…I would have been scared to death!
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By Rachel on Aug 28, 2007 | Reply
See, that would be my excuse to never mow the lawn. Ever.
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