In this city there are two types of people.
- The rich people who have AC. I hate them. And who do they think they are anyway… don’t they care about the ENVIRONMENT?
- The not-so-rich people who swelter and swear and swim in their own sweat when the temperature gage moves up. But at least we’re not excessively carbon-emitting, or at least that’s what we tell ourselves.
You can probably guess which segment I’m a part of.
See, the problem with Seattle is that we have very few hot days. Well really, it’s NOT a problem, except when it is. The thing about having few hot days is that there’s really no need for AC. It’s an excess; an indulgence; an unnecessary expense that most people choose to do without.
And then you get a day like today. A day that’s so hot, the newscasters feel the need to issue an EXCESSIVE HEAT WARNING. Ahem, Thanks guys. I’ll be sure and take off my wool sweater and Uggs because I’m that stupid that I COULDN’T have figured out that it was hot all by myself.
We’re talking days so hot that you’d give your firstborn child, one of your arms (OK, both of them) and all your money to have just one little air conditioner. But wait, there’s already people lined up ahead of you chomping at the bit to sell their firstborn, so the wait is 6 weeks! That’s not gonna help you! Should’ve planned, shouldn’t you? And so you sit and swelter in your own sweat.
8:00 this morning and it was 80 degrees. 8:00 tonight and it’s 90 degrees. I can’t decide if it’s hotter inside or out. Either way, all the sweating CANNOT be good for my skin.
I am MELTING over here!!!!!!!
There’s only one conclusion that can be drawn from this. If you haven’t voted for me for HOTTEST MOMMY BLOGGER, now’s your chance. I am the hottest, I promise.
Still don’t believe me? Well, ok… DON’T SAY YOU DIDN’T ASK FOR IT…
Yeah, I know it’s gross. But see those droplets on my brow? They’re bonafide grade-A sweat drops, and they’ve been there ALL DAY.
Now go vote. Quickly people, before I melt into a giant puddle of sweat and hair. (eww that’s disgusting, even for me)
Everybody now,
It’s getting hot in here
So take off all your clothes…
Offended? Blame it on the heat-induced delirium.
***
Did you enjoy this post? Why not subscribe to email updates or the RSS feed. 
July 12, 2007 at 4:19 am
Poor Jenny! If you lived nearby I’d loan you our air conditioner, really I would!
Don’t hate me.
July 12, 2007 at 5:31 am
I voted. Do I get a sticker?
July 12, 2007 at 5:44 am
Ugh. I feel your pain. It is only hot here maybe 10 days of the year, but on those days I wish I had the money for something as frivolous as am air conditioner. Instead I must settle for my sad little noisy fan.
July 12, 2007 at 6:26 am
I’m empathizing with you here in Idaho Falls. It’s my first summer here and it does get HOT! Not many homes have a/c, including ours. I guess five years ago it snowed on July 4th. I’ve heard that a few times already. It was a fluke, people! Get over it. Install a/c already. Okay, so we won’t. It will cool off in a bit and suddenly a/c will seem extravagant. Only when your forehead is sweaty and has been for 8 hours do you sign over your bank account. Unless, of course, all coolings units are on backorder. I’ll be wishing for cooler days–for both Washington and Idaho!
July 12, 2007 at 7:18 am
Gosh sweetie come on over. I am not rich nor do I dislike the environment. I did have the foresight to buy one of those movable a/c units that vents out a window and can be put near almost any window. McHub and I bought the highest BTU available with a name brand at Frys. 11,500 btu. Um, let’s see, it’s 70 degrees in my living room right now. Yes I know I’m a bitch but I’m a cool bitch! I get even bitchy when I am hot and sweaty. So McHub bought me my second favorite gift ever~~AC!!!!
Oh my gosh, I think Jenny’s turning all green!
July 12, 2007 at 7:25 am
Hahaha. I’m so sorry. It’s been upwards of 100 degrees here, but of course we all have AC, because it does this EVERY year. I can’t even imagine life without it. I’m so sorry. Don’t melt now, ya hear? You’d be sorely missed…
July 12, 2007 at 11:06 am
Voted for you. :) You definitely look hot. I can take the heat, during the day, it’s just nighttime when I want to scream. Mostly I turn on my A/C just to guarantee that I’ll sleep at night.
I’m ugly without sleep. ;)
July 12, 2007 at 12:41 pm
“It’s an excess; an indulgence; an unnecessary expense that most people choose to do without.”
I’m sorry, my southern ass can’t comprehend that kind of logic.
“8:00 this morning and it was 80 degrees. 8:00 tonight and it’s 90 degrees.”
Um, so that’s not normal July weather? Again, my deep southern ass can’t comprehend?
I do feel sorry for you that you don’t have AC. That is as far as my southern self can imagine such an atrocity.
July 12, 2007 at 1:23 pm
Just wanted to let you know that in spite of that gross sweat picture you still got my vote. I really enjoy reading your blog.
Sara
July 12, 2007 at 4:50 pm
My husband keeps it so icy cold in here that I run outside just to warm up. Ok. This comment is not all that helpful. Sorry.
July 12, 2007 at 4:56 pm
I completely detest hot weather. I can’t stand being sweaty. I deplore feeling flushed. Ick. Great eyebrows, btw. I wish I had eyebrows. *sigh*
July 12, 2007 at 6:43 pm
Voted for ya!
I seriously can’t imagine not having A/C! But then again, I live in Cuba. lol
July 12, 2007 at 8:11 pm
Given where I live, the mere thought of living without an AC — oh, I can’t even THINK it.
Awful!
You have my sympathies. (And vote!)
July 12, 2007 at 8:46 pm
Blah, blah, blah.
Poor you. It’s hot. Waaaa!
Sorry, it’s only cool here 10 days every year.
(I really hope you realize I’m joking. Well kind of.)
It really must suck not having AC. Can you go sit in your car with your laptop for a few hours?
I am gi’in so hot, I wanna take my clothes off…
July 12, 2007 at 8:47 pm
Ugh, it’s been nasty here too, but the heat finally broke last night, with a huge boom and a three hour power outage, but now it’s nice and sunny and cool, so it was all worth it in the end.
July 13, 2007 at 10:25 pm
Ummm….I have AC…do you hate me now????
Ottawa sucks weather-wise. It’s completely normal to have -40F winter days here…and completely normal to have summer days that are well over 100F (that’s before factoring in humidity)…we get the freakin’ cold and the boiling hot…fancy, ain’t it?????
BTW….notice that I converted all of my Canadian celusius temps into fahrenheit for ya? That’s how much I like ya!
July 14, 2007 at 2:17 am
Hey, JB, sympathy-r-us! First 4 years in Boise without AC and 100+ in July…no wonder I paid cash for AC in my first new house 15 yrs later. Learned tricks with window units in the interim. (G-ma C told me about your site and it’s great!)
JAG
July 14, 2007 at 10:31 pm
I still wouldn’t mind having an AC in my place :) !!
July 17, 2007 at 1:08 pm
Don’t listen to the rest of them! I live in Tacoma, so I totally know what you’re talking about! This is not normal weather, it is ridiculous! People don’t understand the humitity too. They don’t understand that 70 is great summer weather for us. I think Steve Poole said it’s supposed to rain tomorow though (yay!). :)
(visiting through creaturebug)