Kamikaze Me

Today was One Of Those Days. One Of Those Days where I seem to be ALL left feet and elbows; no grace and even less balance.

Have you ever had One Of Those Days?

It started when I fell down our stairs. I was heading down on my way out to pick up CJ at preschool… humm dee humm dee humm… and WHOOPS! I somehow think I’m at the BOTTOM when, in fact, I have about 4 steps to go. Wham Bam SMACK! One knee is bent at a highly unnatural angle, my elbow is throbbing, and my pride is seriously injured. It’s a good thing I’ve been doing all that yoga, otherwise I’d surely be in a hospital somewhere fighting for my life (or my leg bone).

But it’s just a few bruises, scrapes, etc., so I shake myself off and think, “self, this just shows that you need to pay more attention.” Duly noted, and I’m on my way.

After picking up CJ at preschool, we stop at the grocery store. I have no idea how I managed this, but somehow in picking up a frozen dinner from the cold storage section, I rap my knuckles across the metal shelf… causing me to shout out something very unladylike. CJ says, “what mom?” and I mumble something unintelligible. Strike two. And by “strike” I mean the kind that HURTS.

And adding insult to injury (there couldn’t BE a more appropriate expression), I am telling a friend about my morning… describing my unbelievable klutziness when – IN MID-SENTENCE- I somehow manage to dump half my iced coffee down my shoulder, back, and leg. I don’t know how! I don’t even remember having my arm up there (although it must have been).

That’s it. It is indisputably proven beyond a shadow of a doubt… I should never have gotten out of bed this morning. The gods are angry, the universe is against me, and somewhere in the great beyond a voice is howling, “JENNY NEEDS TO TAKE THE DAY OFF!”

WHY didn’t I listen?

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6 Comments

  1. This post makes me like you lots. I have “one of those days” often. :-)

    Nice to meet you. Love your blog.

  2. OOhh…I can totally relate. I have those days, too, and I just want to curl up in bed and stay very, very still for fear of REALLY damaging myself.

  3. Hahahahaha Jenny!!! What an awful day, but what a brilliant post!

    And the reason you didn’t take the day off is because, well, moms don’t GET days off…

  4. The moon must be in a wacky phase. I’ve felt this exact same way for about two weeks now? Whats up?

  5. Oh no Jenny. you made the squirrel gods very very angry.

  6. Too funny! I still cannot understand the iced coffee everywhere though. I guess I had to be there! This post will be featured on my side bar this month.

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