Absolutely Bananas: Seattle stay-at-home mom blog

My Next Job

I realized something recently; not only am I ecstatically delighted to be no longer gainfully employed (weird, isn’t it?), but I actually think back on my previous career with a sickly feeling that can only be described as loathing.

And I realized, as much as I’m enjoying being a mom, I won’t have a child… or children… to take care of forever. So it only makes sense that I should put some serious thought into my NEXT job. It’s a fun exercise actually; a little like being a senior in high school, without the rampant self-absorption or the obsessive need to chase BOYS.

So here’s my list so far of jobs that I am interested in pursuing… it’s a good thing I have a while to narrow it down!

• Bounty Hunter. If you think this is weird, you clearly haven’t read any of Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum novels. You should… they’re hilarious.
• Travel writer. Fabulous destinations, the best accommodations… well, duh! I’d do it in a heartbeat!



• Famous singer. I watch American Idol thinking, I could do that! well… if I could sing, I could do that. Maybe I’d better cross this one off the list. Although… I could always be a judge…
• Auctioneer. If this one confuses you, you’ll have to read this.
• Interior Designer. How fun would it be to get to decorate house after house, room after room without actually having to live there and watch it get all messed up?

• Adventurer. Ok, so it is true that I refuse to use anything but clean toilets, can’t stand bugs or danger, and tend towards the wimpy side of the personality scale… but I think Laura Croft is cool, plus it’d be fun to carry a whip! And for a completely off-topic remark, I find it odd that “whip” has an h in it. Am I alone here?
• Script writer for a sitcom. Schmooze with the stars, have millions of people laughing at your jokes… it’s a great gig if you can get it.
• Perpetually retired. Not a bad option if I somehow come into mega-money… or convince my husband we don’t need any (money, that is).
• Psychologist. It’s a lot of school, but it’d be fun to get paid to tell people what to do. I think I’d probably be really good at it. (do you hear that groaning sound? that’s everyone who knows me, cumulatively groaning over that last remark.) So maybe I’d be better as a…
• Pop-pyschologist. No school required, and you get to be on TV. I’m sure I could give Dr. Laura or Dr. Phil a run for their money…



• President.
  I don’t aim low, do I? But if W can do it… why can’t I?? Vote for me!

That’s all for now, although I’m sure I’ll think of 20 more the second I try to lie down and go to sleep tonight. It’s the curse of the blogger.

What about you? What’s your next job?

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ok, ok, I admit it… what I really like to do is Photoshop my head onto other people’s bodies. Is that a job?

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